Reflections

In our bedroom we have framed in a series the 3, 6, 9 and 12 month photos of our two children. I look back at pictures of my babies and wonder where they went. They are only 4 and 6 years old. I am so afraid I'm going to wake up one day and they will be in College. I want to remember that they still want to sit on my lap. That they still want to play with me.

They have gotten to be so independant. They play together fairly nicely, I sometimes have to intervene but it is like having a built-in playmate at this point. They love each other but also know how to push the other's buttons.

I find that I don't really have to interact with them anymore. Interact is a harsh word, I'm always there, I am always responding to their questions, oohing and ahhing over their ideas/songs/pictures. But, I can work on the computer, look through a magazine, read a book and let them play together without getting involved. Of course, as soon as I pick up the phone or start to fix dinner, all bets are off.

I really want to start focusing on the moment. Enjoying the right here and now. I have a hard time with that. I am always looking ahead. Sunday, we were all outside enjoying a beautiful day. The girl was on my lap and the boy was on the hubsters. We were all sitting on the grass throwing a ball back and forth. And, I kept thinking of all the things I needed to do....laundry, cleaning, getting papers ready for school the next day. I mentally had to tell myself to relax, enjoy, soak it in!

It is something I think I will constantly be working on.